My Apologies

Dear Mama Rainy,

Yesterday we was havin a good time hangin out watchin the Tennessee-Florida football game with Aunt Kim and Cousin Lily and my brothers.  It was a real tense game!  I was torn as to who to root for: I am a born and raised Tennessee boy, and also I am orange.  However, now we live in Florida and our mascot is the gator, and how can you not root for a gator like my good friend Peanut.  However again, the fans look kinda stupid doin their chompy jaws, I can't say I like that.

But I digress.  I admit to switchin loyalties and even statin that I can't lose if I root for both teams.  I might have been a little drunk.  Well, not really.  Anyway, I do remember gettin real excited at one point and yellin out "Kiss my ass, Mama Rainy!  Kiss my ass!" when Florida lowered the boom that one last time on Tennessee, who you was rootin for. You shoulda seen the look of shock on my face when I realized I had taken things too far. I realized it about 5 minutes after you said, "Simon you take things too far."  And by Simon, I mean Julie.  Dang.

I just wanted to tell you that my mom and me is real sorry we rubbed it in your face that our team was winnin.  Also we are sorry that I kept switchin teams.  I love you, Mama Rainy, and so does my mom, and we was just harrassin you like always and sometimes we don't know when we just gone about 50 yards too far.  We's sometimes like Forrest Gump runnin clear out the stadium with the football.

Anyways, I just wanted to say I'm sorry and I hope we can continue havin our good times together.  I love having our deep conversations and I would be real sad if we couldn't talk no more.  I'll try to be nicer.

Love Simon

That One Time, When My Mom Tried to Kill Me

Hello folks,

I hope you's all doin well this nice afternoon.  And if you's not, I don't want to hear it, cause I just survived my like, third waterboardin incident in my life.  It doesn't get any more fun, let me tell you.

So yesterday, I was havin me a pretty good day!  I was layin on the couch readin my comic books and thinkin about why Jaime and Gilbert Hernandez never puts any cats in Love and Rockets--is it cause they don't have no cats in Hoppers??  That don't seem right, especially when Maggie and Hopey goes to outer space.  They could sure use a cat to help them fix them space ships!

Anyways, all the sudden, my mom comes home and she's hell bent to leather to get the ding dang greasy stuff on everyone's necks.  Apparently my brother Frankie had him a flea allergy attack, which is weird, cause we ain't even SEEN one ding dang flea, so I guess the fleas in Tampa is just invisible like Wonder Woman's plane!  And why ain't she got a cat??  What the hell is goin on that superheroes ain't got no cats???  Cats is awesome--they can show you how to do ninja moves and be super stealthy.  PLUS, they's super low maintenence and don't need you hangin around to let them out to pee all the time.  For reals!

So in the middle of the night, my brother Ty Ty totally freaked out, runnin around and chirpin and lookin wild eyed and dang near destroyin the house!  It was like he got ahold of him some bad LSD or somethin--the moms leapt into action to give him a water shower (what the hell????) and put him in the meow box and rushed him to the vet.

Turns out my mom made a real BAD mistake and gave us all Advantix dog flea medicine, which you can't give to cats like you can dog Frontline. She felt real bad because we all coulda died!  My brother Ty Ty wasn't trippin on acid, he was having him some real bad seizures.  We was all real scared for him.

Anyways, she and Mama Rainy came back about an hour later, and mind you, it was the very middle of the night--I wasn't sleepin, but I wasn't exactly up for no adventures neither.  Next thing I knew, I was locked in the bathroom with my brothers and I knew that wasn't good.  One by one, they brought us out, and I just thought, oh damn.  This is bad news, and I ain't figured out how to jimmy the bathroom window yet!  I didn't hear much noise goin on, and it was super weird.  Then my mom came and got me and was singin some lullaby and kissin on me so I knew I was in trouble.  I had a split second to try to dash away, but she is on to my usual tricks and I had no way to get loose.

(Note to self: develop new tricks!)

Next thing I knew, Mama Rainy was puttin me in the kitty burrito, which ain't unlike this picture that we sent to Grandma Christine yesterday:

I got me a dang BATH!!!  Not a good bath, like when you's layin in the sun lickin your fur and thinkin about life and your next adventures, but a WATER BATH, with smelly soap and everything!  Nothin makes me madder than gettin water boarded, but havin it done in the middle of the night is even more insultin and I let my moms know I wasn't takin anymore of their crap.  Of course, Tyson had already bit the crap out of Mama Rainy when she took him in the shower, so I didn't feel the need to give her another bite.  Her antibiotics bill is gonna cut into my snacky budget as it is.

Also, she's delirious now.  My mom asked her how her chin was feelin a couple hours ago and she said it hurt and she was limpin a lot.  OMG.  Mama Rainy is in bad shape, maybe she needs to go to the hospital where Ty Ty is and get her some muscle relaxers and IVs.  I hear he's gettin to eat wet food at the vet too, she might enjoy her some Fancy Feast.  I'm almost jealous.  

My mom talked to the doctor a couple hours ago and she told me Ty Ty is goin to be just fine and he gets to come home tonight after they make sure he ain't trippin no more.  I'm glad to hear that.  Ty Ty is my newest brother but I like him a whole lot and I LOVE watchin him do his stunt where he leaps across the kitchen way high in the air from one set of cabinets to the others.  He's bad ass!  Someday I'd like to be as strong and brave as Ty Ty.  Also, he's real nice and lets me borrow his plane sometimes.  I'll be glad to see him again.

Well folks, I guess that's all I got to say today.  I was goin to tell you about an adventure I had with some elephants and a lonely sea gull, but you tell me THIS ain't an adventure last night!  From now on, I don't care how pretty it is outside, I'm wearin protection!

Love Simon

Reminiscin on a Rainy Day

Hello Folks! I was just lookin out the window and watchin the rain, and I was thinkin about all my adventures I've had. I've been on some wonderful trips and met me some of the best people in the whole world, and I was thinkin I would share some of my pictures with y'all.

 This is some likenesses of me and my buddy Pepe, who lives in Honduras.  I took me a trip down there a few years ago and I met Pepe while he was playin in the waters of the Caribbean and I was lookin for some starfish.  Pepe grew up in them waters and showed me all the awesome starfish!  What a nice guy!

Pepe was a bit of a ladies' man, and he said them cruise ships always brought pretty girls his way.  As you can see, he wasn't the least bit shy about flirtin with a looker, EVEN in front of her boyfriend!  As we say in Mexico, Pepe has him some cojones!

This is Pepe standin guard over the best starfish in the whole ocean so I could have it. Didn't I tell y'all he was awesome??

These here pictures is from when I was in South Africa, to check out them jumpin sharks they's got down there.  They was some truly amazin guys!!!  I had to do some trainin so's the divin boat would know I wasn't in trouble but I don't know why they was worried, because everywhere I go I make friends!

This is me and Cocosta.  She was showin me how you's supposed to jump with your mouth open, which I thought would slow you down, but she said this way if one o them seals was jumpin at the same time, you didn't have to work so hard, cause you was ready the second you got you some air!  She was awesome and sends me postcards regularly.

This is me in the last part of my trainin, swimmin with Cocosta and her friend Isme.  I'm tellin the divin boat that I'm ok, as you can see from my hand signal. The divin boat was a little irritatin, frankly.  They was what you call them "helicopter parents," always makin me come up and tell them I hadn't been shredded yet.  I probly lost me an hour of divin time keepin them happy.  Dang it.

Well, that's all the pictures I have for you folks today.  This one here is for my girlfriend that I still can't tell y'all about, but I wanted to bring her some pretty flowers while she's off bein a diver.  I'm what you call them, a real romantic.

Love Simon

A Cowboy's Tale

And so, at the end of the day, there we was, me and my trusty steed Pedro, havin traveled 1000 miles of the desert and findin ourselves in the middle of Death Valley with no water and no place else to go...

Ding dang, I am HANDSOME!!!  I think for definitely, I'm gonna be a cowboy for Halloween!  And let me tell you somethin else!  My mom had a TIME tryin to find a proper photo to get my outfit from, so clearly we ain't got enough cowboys lettin people take their likeness!  

I was lookin around for a cowboy photo place, cause I thought, well I'll let people take my picture in my cowboy outfit!  Who better to solve the problem?  And I came across this cowboy named Rudy Gonzales, who is a cowboy POET!  OMG, how wonderful is that???

I gotta go, my Aunt Kim is here and me and Cousin Lily gots things to do, but I'll leave you good folks with one a Rudy's poems:

In the dusk of working cowboys comes a time to fill your cup

And to gather by the fire while the dishes gets washed up.
Time to patch up your old rig or lean back and roll a smoke
While somebody tells a windy or somebody tells a joke.
Or some cowboy makes up verses to the tune of wildwood flower and
Each tries to top the other and it's called the Liars Hour.
Now I know it don't sound fancy but it mends a cowboy's bones
When he's been workin' cattle, a thousand miles from home.
--Rudy Gonzales, Cowboy Poet

Dang, Rudy.  That's deep.  You and me is gonna be good friends, I can tell...

Love Simon

Saturday Morning Death March

OMG, I almost died today.  The moms keep looking at the computer and saying they need more points for their vitalities, so they decided to "do a 5k" this morning.  I don't know what the hell that is so I said, sure! I'll go!  'cause I'm a dog and I guess that makes me kind of a dumb ass.

Frankie and me put our necklaces on and got in the truck, and when the moms stopped, we were at the place in the picture I put up.  I found a map of it a few minutes ago, and this is what it looks like:

You guys probably think that's pretty funny, but it wasn't funny to be out there, let me tell you.  Frankie and I walked in the water and tried to mark our trail as much as we could in case we had a chance to escape, but pretty soon we ran out of pee.  I called a cab to meet me at various places too, but all that happened was this dude drove by on a golf cart and he almost ran me over--he sure didn't offer me a ride or any water. Jerk.

So this is the scene for like 41 years this morning:

I think this is the part where Frankie just disappeared from the whole planet.

Oh wait, there he is.  He's working on that super power still.

People on bikes are dicks.

Walk walk walk walk walk walk walk walk hell.

Oh yeah, and we weren't even supposed to BE in this part!  I told the moms and they just said "rules, schmules."  That's how they roll.  There coulda been snakes or killer alligators or anything waiting up there, we didn't know.

What the hell is that???

So here's the sign that said you aren't supposed to be on the road. But it was real confusing.  Are they really saying maybe they'll prosecute you? Like if they get around to it? Seems pretty casual to me...

 This was fun though!!!  We got to hang out with a horse!!  I even sniffed his nose and ate some of his grass.  He was cool.  He looked weird with that bag thingy on his head.  I guess he didn't want to see me die.  I kept telling the moms that really I'm like 70 years old in dog years and this is super elder abuse, but they laughed at me.  I couldn't believe it.  Laughed.

There's another horse.  He was going to get help, but it never came.

So anyways, at some point I got to meet a band of old ladies that thought I was somethin, and that kept me going for a little while.  You know how I love my Golden Girls.  And finally me and Frankie made it back to the truck and got to go home.  I drank about 3 gallons of water and laid on the tile to cool off.  My cats couldn't believe what we went through.  The moms said we should do this every weekend.  

Oh, come on...

Love,

The Bruce

Adventure, Adventure

Well hello folks!

I am sorry for not keepin my blog as updated as I should.  I have been real busy washin all my underwears since I got back from my latest adventures!!  Last time we spoke, I had borrowed my brother Ty Ty's plane so I could come back and look for my friend Peanut, but I never did tell y'all about my trip to Pinnacles National Park with my Uncle Adam!

Now, my Uncle Adam ain't really my uncle.  He's been my mom's friend for so many years that she got all confused and thinks he's her brother, so that is what makes him my uncle.  To make things even MORE confusin, my Uncle Adam flat out refuses to have his likeness out on the internet cause he's one a them mysterious types.  He's super cool, and I do admit I aspire to be like him.  He's doin some top secret government work, and when I went to meet him in Los Angeles he wouldn't even let me look over his shoulder at his computer or even check my email!  I would say he was a dick, but like I said, I kind of admire him, so I'll hold my tongue.

Anyways, we went hikin in this awesome wilderness area, and I have some pictures to show y'all, but I had to bring a stand in for Uncle Adam, on account he's so cool and won't release the copyright on his likeness.

The hiking was real, real tough at Pinnacles, and me and Uncle Adam both had a tough time tryin to get up the peaks.  As you can see in the picture above, I tried to help him along when I could.  But it was a real beautiful place and the views had a good payoff!

Also, there was these condors livin up there, and I climbed up to one of the nests to try to get me some eggs, as I hear they is some good eatin, but when I got up there, that bird was BIG!!!  I instead gazed upon his beauty for some time and slinked myself back down away from him.

Uncle Adam and me had some good talks, and we did some campin while we was up there.  One night we drank a bunch of wine that I had left from my trip to Monterey and he did let me take his likeness, but the next mornin he smashed my camera.  Now I thought that was a little rude, but I guess that's the price you got to pay if you's goin to hang out with someone that cool!  Anyways, I will admit he hurt my feelins a little, and that's when I got lonely for my friend Peanut and I headed back to Florida.  

I had no idea where Peanut and Allie had moved to, so I just made sure Ty Ty's plane had lots of gas and I flew all over them ding dang Everglades.  Do you know I did not see me even one alligator??  It was ridiculous.

I finally gave up when the pelican at post 25 confirmed my worst suspicions.  Peanut and Allie wasn't there. I was heartbroken.  I landed my plane and drove off on my motorcycle, and then I got me a great surprise! There was Peanut, layin right there on the road!! 

If I hadn't been payin attention I would've run him right over.  Instead I jumped him, which we used to love to do, and then he told me all about his adventures and I told him about mine.  We had a wonderful time for a couple of days and then I came home to do my laundry.  I'm plannin on goin to visit Peanut again real soon, and he's gonna show me one a his best fishin holes.  I can't wait!!!

Love Simon

Lookin for Peanut

I ain't got no kinda time to go into details, but basically I went campin with my Uncle Adam for a couple of days but I was missin Peanut too much so I borrowed me a plane and I'm goin back to Florida to look for my friend.  I'll keep y'all apprised of my goins on.  

Love Simon

More Words from the Campfire

Last night, after I had shaved off that itchy goatee and written in my blog, I laid in my tent and thought about my awesome life. Here I was, a few feet from my crackly campfire, and some 100 feet from the roarin and crashin Pacific Ocean. 

In my head, I asked myself, "Simon, can you be any luckier?" and after I thought about it, I could only reply, "no."

This mornin, I headed down to Monterey, old home to another one of my favorite writers, John Steinbeck.  Now, he wrote him some wonderful books, includin this one about a road trip he took with his dog, Charley.  I loved that

book and I love puppies. I even asked Frankie and Bruce if they wanted to come on this adventure with me, but Bruce was too itchy and Frankie's scared of motorcycles. I also asked my cousin Lily to come but she said she couldn't be that far away from her mom. Dang. I guess if I want to take a road trip with a puppy, I'll have to get me a poodle.

Anyways, I walked around the wharf and had me some fishies and an ice cream cone, and I basked in the sunshine.  I thought of a quote in another book I love by John Steinbeck, called Tortilla Flat. No, not the one that says "Here you play in the street, little chicken. Someday an automobile will run over you, and if it kills you, that will be the best thing that can happen. It may only break your leg or your wing. Then all your life you will drag along in misery. Life is too hard for you, little bird." 

When I read that passage the first time, I nearly gave up eatin chicken! But then Mama Rainy cruelly brought home a bucket of KFC, and next thing I knew, I was beggin for a piece. It was dang near involuntary, my cravin for the Colonel's 11 herbs and spices! That was a good supper that night.

Yum!!!!  Wait...is that right?  I'm so confused...

Now, I don't generally imbibe in the pleasures of alcohol, but today I got me one a them "rider bottles" of wine that my mom's friend used to drink on her long drive home from work every day and I wandered around the streets at the wharf like a real paisano.  I felt like I was in one of them John Steinbeck books, and it was wonderful!



Back here at the campfire, the sun is goin down. Back home in Florida, I am imaginin the nightly routine: Mama Rainy comes home first and takes off her pantalones, and then mom comes home and takes off her brassiere. They's gonna have KFC tonight because my writin is gonna make them crave it. Mama Rainy's gonna play her video game where she has to make burgers for a lot of people and my mom is gonna wonder why she don't just go down and work at the McDonald's if she really wants to be that stressed out.  She's gonna turn a light on and Mama Rainy's gonna turn it off.  They's gonna talk about their day and my brothers is gonna play outside til the lightnin starts. Then they's all gonna climb in our big bed and go to sleep.  My moms will both snore, Frankie will get too hot and get on the floor, and Ty Ty will steal Mama Rainy's pillow.  We's all happy at my house.

I will lay here in my tent and listen to the ocean and feel happy to be me. 

Oh yeah! I forgot to tell you my John Steinbeck quote that's not about the chickens! "The afternoon came down as imperceptibly as age comes to a happy man."

Love Simon

Simon's Fireside Chat

Dear Faithful Fans,

Today, I rode up to San Francisco, to where my wanderin hero Jack Kerouac spent some time when he was alive.  I think it is many a young cat's desire to roam the streets of North Beach, espoutin jazzy poetry and feelin the music and sense of wanderlust that propels us to the road.  

I've been doin a lot of thinkin about my life and how I ain't had an adventure like this in quite some time.  I was content in my home in Tampa, but then my buddy Peanut left, on account his girlfriend Allie had to go search out another pond to hunt in, seein as how some farmers thought her water was dirty and they killed the algae.  Allie had no more camouflage and she and Peanut headed to the Alligator Alley where no jerk farmers can mess with them.


I was lonely after my good buddy and his old lady left, so my mom said maybe I should go have me an adventure.  I wasn't even having fun harassin Mama Rainy, so I packed up my motorcycle and headed west.  (Well, first I went north 'cause you can't drive a motorcycle through the Gulf of Mexico.  Although maybe next time I head west I can ride me a shark to California, on account of a certain admirer who knows some sharks who can give me a ride...)

Sorry, I just can't tell you who I'm givin these here flowers to, y'all.  It's top secret!

It took me longer than I thought to reach California, but it was worth it, 'cause I had me one a them epiphanies when I crossed the river of my birth where it goes into the Gulf of Mexico.  I realized that the Mississippi herself was like my mama's birth canal--God rest her soul--and the Gulf of Mexico was my life, all wavy and tryin  to get back to my moms, but once I made it past the breakers, it was time to have my adventures I love so much. I sat on the banks and I won't say a tear wasn't shed, 'cause when you get you an epiphany like that, you cry!  You just ain't got no choice, really.

Of course, along the way to California, I ran into some of my family, also descendants on Grandpa Sanchez's side.  Some of them I had seen at our family reunion some years back, and it sure was good to see them and sleep in they's houses at night.  Even though I'm still young, the ground ain't all that comfortable to sleep on!  My cousin Carlos in New Mexico had him one a them Sleep Number beds for me to sleep in and I discovered my sleep number is 35, just like Lindsey Wagner, who was my mom's first crush when she was in that show on the TV called The Bionic Woman.  But she started in The Six Million Dollar Man, and I ain't gonna lie, I got me one a them boy crushes on Steve Austin. He's super tough!

Wow, they's both tough!

Anyways, here it is, almost midnight.  The stars is real pretty when they ain't obscured by fog.  I'm gettin sleepy, so I'm goin to sleep.  I'll tell y'all more about my adventure durin tomorrow's campfire time.

Love Simon

Time Away

Dear Faithful Fans,

It is durin this time that I have chosen to start readin me some Jack Kerouac and thusly have started a great and lonely journey. I am writin to you from Big Sur, California.  Just last night I was campin by the Pacific Ocean and readin my book.

It was Jack Kerouac who once said, "somethin good will come out of all things yet and will be golden and eternal, just like that." He was right. Just look at me.  I started out without much, and then some aforenamed assholes stole my man parts and fingers, and yet, now I am the awesomest member of Tribe Atherton, and I get to go on adventures whenever I want!  I never deny I have a good life.  But with the big move and all, I've been feelin outta sorts, so I thought I'd come out here and philosophize and whatnot.  

I'm havin so many deep thoughts I am givin myself a headache! I think I'll get back on my bike for now and do some more ridin. Don't forget me, as I will be back home soon. Maybe I'll write me a book while's I'm out here on the road.  You know, lost in the Great Abyss and whatnot.  Growin my brain and gettin my travelin feet some miles on them.  Discoverin what lies beyond...

Love

Simon Thaddeus Atherton

Hello To My New Friend I Hadn't Met Just Yet

Dear Amanda Cotton,

We hadn't met yet, but my name is Simon Thaddeus Atherton.  I know you can't wait to read all about me in this here blog, but basically I was born and then I crawled out the Mississippi River so I could have a life filled with adventures!  I have been all over the world doin all kinds of things.  My moms said you have too, and also you take pretty pictures, which is why I am introducin myself.  I heard you like to swim with sharks and I'm pretty sure you and me is gonna be best friends cause I also love to swim with folks that some people thinks is dangerous!  Take my friend Peanut.  Now Peanut is about as vicious as a teddy bear, but cause he's like 15 feet long and weighs about 400,000 pounds (yes, he needs to get him on a diet--I keep tellin him!) people thinks he's scary!  But Peanut and I go fishin with my other friend Ralph all the time.  I will say, when we go together, nobody fights us for the best fishin hole!  Hee!  Here's a picture of us this one time...

Anyways, I wanted to talk to you about how you have this awesome opportunity to take my likeness with your sharks!  I am very handsome, as you can see, and I would love to meet them sharks that act like Chihuahuas!  My friend Lily is a Chihuahua and she is awesome.  I can't wait til she comes to my house next weekend.  Lily can't wait neither, as you can see.  Maybe she could even come swimmin with us and then she could maybe meet her a new friend!

Let me know when you want to get started.  In addition to bein very handsome, I am also a wonderful story teller and I will tell you all about my Grandpa Sanchez and how he won the Mexican Revolution, as well as all the adventures I have been on!  I can't wait til we finally meet.

Love

Simon T. Atherton

The Freedom Train

Hello everybody!

Simon here.  Right at this very moment, there is a new guy campin out in my office for a couple a days.  His name is Tyson, and he just flew in from  somewheres in Florida, which is ironic, cause that's where I'm fixin to move to!  He says the weather is real nice down there and he doesn't know why I haven't left yet, because this is some terrible crap weather he ain't never seen before!  However, he did also say he doesn't care about the weather so much because he's just happy to be alive.  Just a short time ago, Tyson was in a terrible predicament where he was in a cage and these people was fixin to kill him just because they had too many cats in their shelter.  Dang.  Thankfully for Tyson, there's a wonderful superhero in Florida named Dorian Wagner who saved his life and got him a place to stay til she could find him a new home.

Turns out, Tyson's new home is in Maryville, Tennessee!  Of course, Dorian is so busy savin lives and such that she ain't got time to drive every cat she saves 'round the country to they's new houses, so she gets people to drive the cats as far as they can, and then someone else drives them some more, and so on until the cat gets to his new home.  And somehow, Tyson got REAL lucky, cause one a them people had them an airplane!  So Tyson got to fly to Tennessee today, and now he's hangin out in my office.  I don't mind sharin one bit.  Here's a couple a pictures of our new friend.  He's a real nice guy and I'm sure glad he's gonna be okay.

This is Tyson earlier today, flyin through the bright blue sky.  Boy, was he in for a shock when he got here to the ice and snow!

Here's Tyson, gettin some rest after his long journey.

Well, that's all for now.  I'll keep y'all appraised of the goins on.

Love,

Simon

HQ Relocation

Hey Everyone!

My moms said it's FINALLY okay to tell you guys that we are moving to Tampa, Florida!  I'm real real excited because it's gonna be sunny and I don't have to freeze to death when I go outside to sit by my swimming pool.  I'm so excited I used the Powershop to show you guys a picture of what it's going to look like at my new house.

My moms said we're leaving in the middle of March, and if it's still a sheet of ice outside, we'll even call for air support if that's what it takes to get out of this place.  

Don't worry, you guys, we'll still be on our blog.  And we'll miss all our friends in Tennessee but we hope they'll come visit us and also we can't wait to make new friends in Florida!  My brother already has his gator gang all picked out.  He says maybe Peanut will come up and get the truck out of the ditch so we can leave. He's calling him right now.

Okay, that's all for now.  I'm so excited!!!!!!!

Love,

Griffin

Frozen Wednesday

Hey y'all!

Well, it's Wednesday, and sure enough, it's colder than the ice Bruce likes to munch on in the summertime.  Dang.  Me and Hansel got to talkin last night when it was clear the weather folks wasn't goin to change their minds about freezin us to death, and we decided it was time to get the hell out of Dodge!  So we jumped on our motorbikes and headed out.  We don't know when we'll come back, but we's headed to all points south, and we'll be reportin to you folks along the way.  So far, we made it to our new hometown of Tampa, and here's a picture of us navigatin the Bayshore Boulevard.  Sunrise is so pretty in Florida...

Til next time, this is me and Hansel, signin out!

Love Simon

Winter Daydreams

Hey y'all!

This is Simon.  If any of y'all follow me on Facebook, you can see that I am tryin my best to avoid the cold weather. It is terrible, and it ain't even that cold yet!  I can't wait to move to Florida, where it don't never get this cold except very rarely, and this is as cold as it gets, not like next Wednesday here when it's supposed to be 19 dang degrees!!   This is where I'll be Wednesday:

Me, all wrapped up in my cowboy blankie!

A few weeks ago (lookin back, I wish I'd saved this trip for NEXT week when it's gonna be so dang cold!) I visited Tampa, which is a wonderful city.  Some friends of mine just sent me the pictures, and I will share them with y'all as well, as I know you like to look at me on my adventures.

This is me ridin past Ybor City, where they make all the awesome cigars...

This is me ridin past these chicks lookin all cool.  Oh yeah, and they wasn't too bad lookin either...

We was havin so much fun in the sunshine, we even drove to Key West!

On the way back home, I was bored so I jumped a gator with my motorcycle.  I am an awesome rider!

Anyways, I'm back home now and it's cloudy and cold and no fun at all.  My New Year's resolution is definitely to move to Florida!!!  Until then, I'll be under my blankies, dreamin about sunshine and oranges.

Love Simon